bleh. im still sick!! its unbelievable. i gotta check the record books cause i mayyy be elligible...
okay not true. actually when i think about it ive only been sick for 9 days. BUT STILL! thats a longggg time for me.
over it!
i didnt drag myself to the gym this morning (although be proud, i made it to EVERY class!!!!!) and im not sure if i can drum up enough energy to go tonight either, though i said i would. my energy levels have already crashed. im soo over being sick , its kind of robbed me of my willpower & running my own life haha. i feel like... wow, did i really go to the gym twice a day and was so in control? now im just worried about not overeating... its definitely put alot of emphasis back on the calorie intake and food control and its not cool. its driving me nuts in fact. i miss the gym! im probably going to force myself to go there tonight.. but thats always easy to say when its "later" haha. not now,, later.... i shouldve gone this morning i guess. though i dont know when since i went to my classes.
sigh.
tomorrow's friday, but im weighing myself on saturday because im not going home this weekend, so what the hell and also i was not good monday & ESP tuesday so i just want to put it off as long as possible. but this scares me because although i feel just as slim as before the binge i dont know... bodies do crazy things... i couldnt really accoutn for the 3.4 loss last week so what if it just decides to pop back up? i told myself i wouldnt mind if i gained a lb but ... i lied lol i want to at least stay at 208. especially since my thanksgiving dream is 205. oh man.
i wanna get back on track! go away sickness. im sure itll be gone by tomorrow or at least saturday i should be back in the groove.
okay i have nothing more to say :) POSITIVE VIBES! my new goal is to be sickeningly optimistic no matter what reality says lol
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